I have this sort of unspoken agreement with myself that, when making up my stuff - whatever it is - I'll avoid the overtly cliche. What this one's called, however, seems less a chosen title and more a given task: "Here ~ Explain this."
It's my own self that's seeking to understand.
I keep thinking about these last, oh, let's say five or six years. These have been the grandbaby years - probably the most solid-seeming era of my life so far. And yet, so little about this time has been stable and sure. As familiar as I've grown with change through the years (and sudden, shocking change, indeed!), the pushes and yanks, the yeses and nos, the stays and gos of these most recent times have left me feeling, oh, let's say a little bit uncertain.
What would I have done with my life had all the choices been entirely mine? How might I have plotted my course ... who'm I kidding there? I never had such initiative as that!
But it does seem that a broadness has opened up in front of me. Suddenly, I am without the daily tasks of grandbabies and there is all this time to fill.
Certainly, I could go and learn something new; however, it's hard to justify a pottery class at my age. At least not when considering the reality of our diminishing income. The husband thinks it's a great time for me to seek new income endeavors - but I'm convinced that nobody's going to pay me to just sit and stare. That is, after all, what I do best and the idea of branching out ... well, again, there's my age.
It may be, however, that I have to make an actual plan, make some choices, plot a course. Oh, geez.
But there's time enough for that. For now, I'm content enough to wander.
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| photo source: mitchellkphotos.com |
So there's no poetry here.
No Moral To This Story.
There's no scripture lesson.
No real conclusion.
Except that
- still -
I know the way is forward and
I am never lost if I know the way.
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